Have you Ever Been A Part of a Cult, High-Control Group, or Relationship?
You are not alone.
Join us for a One-Day Conference on May 11th, 2024 in Portland, Oregon for Education, Healing, and Community.
Not Alone: a Conference for Survivors and Helping Professionals
Hear from helping professionals and connect with other survivors. Together we can overcome the trauma of cults and high-control groups or relationships.
This event is sponsored by the Spiritual Abuse Forum for Education, which is a regular meetup in Portland, Oregon for those who have left or are considering leaving high-demand religious groups, and for those with friends and loved ones who are members of such groups.
This will be our second SAFE sponsored conference in Portland. Our first event was in 2019, and we had over 70 attendees!
Check out this interview between Ken Garrett and Ashlen Hilliard on the Spiritual Abuse Forum for Education (SAFE) Meetups in Portland, Oregon. This was filmed originally in 2021.
Conference Co-Sponsors
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People Leave Cults
Local Co-Sponsor
People Leave Cults provides cult intervention and recovery services. We Serve Current and Former Cult Members, their Family, Friends, and Loved Ones.
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Empathy Paradigm Consulting
Local Co-Sponsor
The Empathy Paradigm empowers individuals, communities and corporations to embrace and understand emotional intelligence, inclusivity, wellness and growth through affordable and accessible empathy-based training and coaching. We specialize in Religious Trauma, Psychological Safety, and the LGBTQIA+ community.
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Ecumenical Ministries of Oregon
Local Co-Sponsor
Ecumenical Ministries of Oregon is a statewide association of faith partners working together to improve the lives of Oregonians through public policy advocacy, direct service programs, creation justice, and interreligious education and dialogue.
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The Aftermath Foundation
Co-Sponsor
The challenges one encounters when leaving Scientology and the Sea Org are many. The Aftermath Foundation is devoted to providing resources, support, and advocacy to those who leave so they can gain their independence and make their way in the world. The Aftermath Foundation is also dedicated to raising public awareness of the abusive practices of Scientology.
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The SPTV Foundation
Co-Sponsor
We empower, support, and advocate for individuals leaving or who have left Scientology as they rebuild their lives and their journey towards a brighter future.
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CultNews101
Co-Sponsor
News, links and resources about cults, cultic groups, abusive relationships, movements, religions, political organizations, medical and related topics. Offering news, intervention, and recovery.
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Cult Mediation
Co-Sponsor
Resources designed to help thoughtful families and friends understand and respond to the complexity of a loved one’s cult involvement, controlling relationship and environments. Since 1984, we have helped people with destructive groups, cults, mind control, brainwashing, parental alienation, estrangements, abusive relationships, gurus, multi-level marketing, violent extremism and other forms of undue influence.
Conference Presentations
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This presentation examines the intersectionality of spiritual abuse and sexual abuse of adults. Survivors of abuse in religious environments often have the experience of living with profound, lifelong wounds while not having access to the language for their experience. As a result, many are disbelieved, blamed and silenced by the institutions they trusted. It has only been in recent years that research has begun to address this hermeneutical injustice through the development of a conceptual understanding of spiritual abuse. As this knowledge base has broadened, there has also been an effort to develop accurate language for adult clergy sexual abuse. Due to the reality that many victims of abuse experience poly-victimization across their lifespan; it is helpful to identify how these two types of abuse overlap. Spiritual abuse is characterized by control and manipulation, it can also be a tool used to groom victims of adult clergy sexual abuse. In the research, identifiable patterns have been noted in the grooming process including the characteristics that make someone vulnerable to both spiritual abuse and adult clergy sexual abuse. In order to understand the nuanced and complex nature of these two forms of abuse, it is helpful to name these vulnerabilities and patterns. In the naming, we are both able to help survivors heal and prevent the traumatic re-enactment of abuse and abusive environments.
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“I thought I trusted God, and look what happened.” When cults, high control groups or unhealthy churches use psychological and social control to enforce their ideology, and do so in the name of God or some other divinity, their subject's lives are violated to the core of their being. They thought they were trusting in a God that would provide for them but found their lives emotionally, vocationally financially and spiritually turned inside out.
Recovering from spiritual abuse and re-establishing faith is a difficult project at best and most often is the last task that a survivor of spiritual abuse is able to undertake.
This workshop will examine the issues of:
-- trust,
-- free will,
-- how spiritual emotions are manipulated and healed,
-- deconstructing a sick theology that reinforced the coercive control used by abusive groups,
-- reconnecting with resources of spiritual wisdom,
-- how to safely explore the institutions that carry that wisdom and
-- making meaning from a new vision informed by an awareness of what was hurtful in the past.
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So many of us that join cults, enter as sincere seekers wanting to deepen, feel more connected to the spiritual, to ourselves, to what’s beautiful and good in all things. If we leave, only to find that our purpose feels adrift, our community non-existent, or life is lacking the luster of what was, we often turn to alternatives. In this presentation, Jennifer shares some of the most significant tactics and dynamics that unfold just beneath our awareness, in hopes that bringing them to the surface might protect or alert the spiritual seeker to the intricate subtleties that are so often hidden.
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Experiencing a cultic or coercive environment can have a tremendous impact on our physical and mental health. It is not uncommon for survivors to have symptoms of complex post-traumatic stress, or dissociative symptoms. In this presentation, we explore different approaches to coping with and healing from complex trauma associated with cult involvement. The presentation will discuss current trauma psychotherapies such as EMDR, IFS, and somatic therapies, as well as other healing modalities, and how they might be best adapted to help cult survivors. We will also describe ways to communicate and work with therapists or other mental health professionals who may not understand cult-related trauma.
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This presentation centers around the use of art as a tool for self-connection and healing. Specifically, we explore Visual Somatic Mapping with an optional written portion utilizing processes from Nonviolent Communication. This presentation aims to help participants understand ethical use of creative expression and art therapy can create containment, foster inner awareness, and create new pathways for healing from self-alienation and complex trauma. Participates will have the opportunity to engage in the strengths-based art experiential.
The Visual Somatic Mapping exercise is an application Art Therapy that is being used in a new application in conjunction with Nonviolence Communication to support cultic recovery. The theoretical framework draws from concepts of neurology based complex post-traumatic stress, Trauma informed Art Therapy, and Nonviolent Communication.
Visual Somatic Mapping allows participants to map their body experience in a visual way in order to have a time print of their inner truth. With ongoing ethically based and cultic recovery informed support this can help build a sense of validation of their personal boundaries and hence self-advocacy. Preliminary outcomes indicate increased self-awareness and an increased grounding to sense of self in everyday life.
Exploring this practice, participants may be able to learn about a creative tool to help bridge the gap between the inner wilderness created by coercive control and the conscious self. Future steps involve refining the methodology and exploring its application in therapeutic contexts within cult recovery.
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Many survivors have difficulty defining, creating, and fostering safe and healing communities after leaving a high-control group or relationship. Understanding what safety looks and feels like is an essential part of the healing journey, so we’ll be exploring a framework that can act as a foundation for defining individual psychological safety. The purpose of this talk is to identify attributes of healthy people and communities, as well as understand psychological safety as a means of re-integration and healing.
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The panel discussion, "Navigating Scientology: Perspectives from Generational Differences," delves into the diverse experiences of individuals born or raised (also known as second or multi-generational former members) within Scientology compared to those who joined as first-generation members. Scientology, with its unique doctrines and organizational structure, has left a significant impact on the lives of its adherents across generations.
Drawing from personal narratives, this panel aims to shed light on the nuanced dynamics amongst those who have had involvement within Scientology. Key themes to be addressed include familial expectations, indoctrination processes, social networks, and the challenges of leaving the organization.
Through the juxtaposition of these perspectives, the panel seeks to foster a deeper understanding of the complexities inherent in navigating life within and beyond Scientology. Moreover, it will provide a platform for reflection on the intergenerational transmission of beliefs and practices within high-demand religious movements.
Moderated by Cult Intervention Specialist, Ashlen Hilliard, the panel will feature voices from various backgrounds, offering a rich tapestry of experiences and insights. Attendees can expect a thought-provoking discussion that illuminates the diverse roads personal identity can take after departing from Scientology.
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How do people get trapped in abusive groups and what are the signs to look for? The Empathy Paradigm will adapt the Abuse Prevention Project's Power & Control Wheel to help attendees identify the power and control tactics that trap victims in coercive groups. We’ll raise awareness about how power and control is wielded in high-demand groups, what we need to pay attention to in recovery from these groups, and how to spot red flags in new groups/relationships to avoid repeating the pattern.
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To most Christians, joining and supporting a local church is an important, even sacred aspect of their faith. The decision to commit to a spiritual community can be one of the deepest community commitments a person makes in life, and the decision to leave a beloved church can be equally significant. What shall a person do when their beloved church becomes a place of coercion, control, and spiritual abuse? Should they immediately walk away? Confront abusive leaders? Stay and hope for a change as a loyal opposition? These are all possible decisions, and all represent the end of deep, heartfelt, and often heart-breaking deliberation. In this workshop Pastor Ken will draw from his own experience of leaving an abusive Christian church and his studies in the processes of thought-reform that can occur in unhealthy, hurtful church communities. We will develop a working model to help a church member negotiate the difficulties and decisions faced when their church becomes abusive.
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What are the basics of recovering from a destructive cult or coercive situation one was involved in? We all know the first steps are getting away from the abuse, but then what? And then what after that? There are no concrete steps everyone has to walk, but there are some guide rails we can know about that can keep us on the path forward. In this talk, Chris will cover these basics and how to build a more healthy life, relationships and mental health for yourself after escaping a coercive situation.
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People who have left cults are sometimes approached by members of the media to discuss their experiences. Participating can have upsides and downsides. Asserting yourself and owning your story can feel good and alert people to a problematic group or experience that they should stay away from. In addition, you are also supporting other victims and validating their experiences, encouraging others to come forward, which could lead to justice for those harmed. However, going public also puts you in a vulnerable position. It can be embarrassing, and you don’t know what information will end up making it into the public. Others who disagree with you can get mad, accuse you of lying and even threaten litigation. Let’s talk about why you would or wouldn’t want to share your story with a reporter, filmmaker, podcaster, author or other media creator after leaving a high-demand group. What should you watch out for? What important aspects of this interaction should you keep in mind if you choose to go forward? Why might the journalist have to operate by certain rules? How do you take care of yourself? Get tips from a media consultant with a background in journalism who also grew up in a cult and is sympathetic to both sides of this equation.
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Are you wanting to learn how to be more effective with helping other survivors? Are you needing more tools and insight for how to advocate for them? Are you wanting to take the next step in recovery and support those who have been through religious and cult trauma? This workshop is for you!
Conference Speakers
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Connie A. Baker, MA LPC
Religious Abuse Recovery Specialist and Licensed Professional Counselor
Connie Baker is a licensed professional counselor with a Master of Arts. She is a clinical supervisor, Masters Level University instructor, Seminar speaker and Workshop facilitator.
She is a Trauma Recovery Specialist, trained life coach and the author of her book, Traumatized by Religious Abuse-Discover the Cultures and Systems of Religious Abuse and Reclaim Your Personal Power’.
It is the culmination of her own story and her years of experience as a therapist.
Connie is sought after for guidance, radio and television interviews, and contributions to magazines for support and education about religious abuse and trauma recovery.
Connie lives in Portland, OR with her husband, JR. They have 3 grown children and 2 grandchildren.
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Anna Tolf
Co-Founder of Restored Voices Collective
Anna Tolf, Co-Founder of Restored Voices Collective, a nonprofit championing survivors of Adult Clergy Sexual Abuse, brings a unique blend of advocacy and empathy to the forefront. Currently finishing her academic tenure pursuing a Master of Arts in Counseling Psychology at the Seattle School of Theology and Psychology, Anna combines academic excellence with a survivor-centered approach to her work.
With a deep commitment to trauma-informed therapy, Anna draws from personal experiences of religious trauma and institutional betrayal, fostering an environment of understanding and healing. This firsthand perspective enriches Anna's work, creating a bridge between theory and the lived reality of survivors.
Anna’s healing journey was a process which began in her role of Executive Pastor at a church in the Seattle area. As a result, she has a nuanced understanding of the intersections between faith, trauma, and the journey to restoration.
Join Anna at the conference for an engaging dialogue that seamlessly weaves together professional expertise, academic insights, and a heartfelt dedication to amplifying the voices of those who have experienced trauma within religious contexts. Expect a transformative session that navigates the complexities of healing with authenticity and compassion.
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Chris Shelton, MSc
Cult Educator and Recovery Specialist
Chris Shelton is a former Scientologist turned cult recovery specialist, author and broadcaster. He has been working on educating the public about the dangers of destructive cults ever since he escaped Scientology in 2013, documenting his recovery experience in transitioning back into a normal life. As a cult expert, he has personally helped hundreds of people either recover from destructive cult influence or assisted their family and friends in how to best communicate and work with cult members to help get them out from under undue influence.
Chris holds a Masters in the Psychology of Coercive Control and is a Research Assistant at the University of Salford in Manchester. He runs a YouTube channel, produces a weekly podcast called Speaking of Cults and has written Scientology A to Xenu: An Insider's Guide to What Scientology is Really All About. He has produced over 1,000 videos laying out the anatomy and mechanics of cultic and predatory influence, the basics of critical thinking and has done interviews with former members of many different destructive cults, as well as a range of therapists, cult exit counselors, educators and media personalities. Chris has also given talks and presentations around the United States about his experiences and has been featured on numerous podcasts and television shows. He was featured on Leah Remini’s Emmy-award winning documentary, Scientology and the Aftermath, and served as a consultant to the show for its first two seasons.
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Anna Clark Miller (She/They), NCC, LPC-S, LMHC-S
Therapist, Trainer, Author | Co-Owner of Empathy Paradigm
Anna Clark Miller, co-owner of Empathy Paradigm, and owner of Empathy Paradigm Therapy, is a licensed counselor practicing in Texas and Washington. She specializes in recovery from religious trauma and high-control groups. Anna recently published a book called The Religious Trauma Survival Guide and she hosts a religious trauma podcast called Martyr, She Wrote. In addition to her work as a therapist, Anna offers training for mental health professionals and church leaders who are working with religious trauma survivors.
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Josh Miller (He/They), MCPC
Psychological Safety Trainer, Identity Development Coach | Co-owner of The Empathy Paradigm
Josh is the co-owner and co-founder of The Empathy Paradigm, and currently works as the primary Psychological Safety Consultant and Identity Development Coach. His professional background as a Qualified Mental Health Professional is in mental health crisis intervention, medical withdrawal stabilization, and suicide awareness training. He holds his Master Certified Professional Coach certification through an ICF accredited institution, and is a member of the Advisory Board of the CSU East Bay Customer Experience program as an inclusive culture specialist. He's been featured in The CEO Magazine, BBC's Equality Matters, and the Manage HR Magazine. Josh proudly believes in the undeniable innate value of humans, universal belonging and social responsibility, and he works to empower all individuals to explore and confidently express their identity and beliefs.
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Natalee Bigger Stockdale, MA, ATR-BC, LPCC, NCC
Complex Trauma Focused Art Psychotherapist and Artist
Natalee Bigger Stockdale is a Board Certified Art Therapist and Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor in the state of Minnesota. She currently works in private practice and specializes in working with clients who have experienced complex trauma. As a cult survivor, she understands the complex nature of exiting a high demand group and the labor that recovery entails. She works to bring this attuning sensitivity, along with evidence based multimodal therapeutic models, to her clients with gentleness. Natalee is passionate about sharing her knowledge and skills with other survivors and the professionals working with them. Natalee aims to promote awareness of the unique struggles in recovery from complex trauma and ways art therapy can foster healing.
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Erin Falconer (she/her), PhD, MSc, LMSW
Cult Recovery and Complex Trauma Psychotherapist
Dr. Erin Falconer provides psychotherapy and consultation for individuals and their families who are dealing with the effects of coercive control, cultic abuse, and complex trauma. Dr. Falconer completed her MSW at Columbia University in New York, and her PhD in Psychology, which focused on the neuroscience of trauma, at the University of New South Wales in Sydney, Australia. She also completed post-graduate study in the psychology of coercive control at the University of Salford (UK). She is currently continuing her advanced training in trauma-focused therapies at the Institute for Contemporary Psychotherapy in New York. She provides psychotherapy in New York at Refuge Psychotherapy, LCSW, PLLC.
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Jennifer French Tomasic (She/Her), MSc
Cult & Religious Recovery Specialist
A survivor herself, Jennifer French Tomasic specializes in working with survivors of coercive control. She has a Masters in the Psychology of Coercive Control and is a certified Integrative Trauma practitioner. Jennifer is an affiliate of Dr. Gillie Jenkinson’s specialized cult and religious recovery approach, grounded in survivor research and offered in both individual and group settings. She is also a level 2 trained Internal Family Systems practitioner. Jennifer is not a licensed psychotherapist. She hosts the Project Hope Podcast for families and friends with loved ones in a group of high control / high demand. She is a member of the ICSA (International Cultic Studies Awareness) Research Committee and has conducted research on those who self-identify as having experienced coercive control and received Internal Family Systems (IFS) as a result. Jennifer is an advocate and expert witness in court cases involving coercive control. She works both across the US and internationally and currently lives in Los Angeles, CA with her husband and extended family.
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Rev. Kenneth Garrett, MDiv. DMin.
Pastor | Conference Co-Organizer
Rev. Kenneth Garrett, MDiv. DMin. is senior pastor of Grace Church, Portland, OR. For 12 years Ken and his wife Sharon belonged to an abusive, controlling church in which their life-choices, beliefs, and behaviors were increasingly brought under the control of church leaders. Ken and Sharon left church in 1996 with their three daughters. Ken attended seminary and has completed post-graduate research in spiritual abuse as it occurs in Christian churches. Ken and Sharon now enjoy many opportunities to counsel and care for survivors of abusive churches from the Portland-metro area and have established the Spiritual Abuse Forum for Education (SAFE), a regular gathering to promote friendship and education for survivors of spiritual abuse. Ken's book, In the House of Friends: Understanding and Healing from Spiritual Abuse in the Christian Church, (Wipf and Stock Press, 2020) describes the inner workings of high-control churches, the pastors who lead them, and the process of leaving and recovering from the abuse inflicted by such churches.
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Kent Burtner, M. Div., M.A.
Pastoral Counselor | Conference Co-Organizer
Kent Burtner, M. Div., M.A., served as a Roman Catholic priest of the Dominican Order for 20 years, resigning from the priesthood in 1994. He subsequently served as program manager for an interfaith social-services agency, director of the agency’s Cult Resource Center, public-information officer for a local county public-health department, and parish business manager. A published author, Kent has also lectured extensively in the United States, Canada and Spain. In 1983, he received the Leo J. Ryan Award from the Cult Awareness Network for his work educating the public about cults and thought-reform programs. Kent makes his home in Portland, Oregon and as a pastoral counselor has consulted with more than a thousand individuals or families about the cult affiliations of their loved ones and about adjusting to life after leaving a cult or other high-control group. wkburtner@aol.com.
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Ashlen Hilliard, MSc (she/her)
Cult Intervention Specialist | Conference Co-Organizer
Ashlen is a Cult Intervention Specialist and the founder of People Leave Cults. Most days, you'll find her helping families with loved ones in cultic or high-control groups or relationships. She also offers psychoeducation services for survivors of coercion, and recently started support groups for cult survivors. She holds an MSc in the Psychology of Coercive Control and conducted exploratory quantitative research on the relationship between reproductive coercion, psychologically abusive environments, and the extent of group identity in a sample of those who have left cultic groups.
Ashlen's experience in the cult recovery field started on the front lines - helping individuals leave various polygamist communities in the Western US. From there, she went on to be the Director of Events for the International Cultic Studies Association (ICSA), where she organized workshops, webinars, and conferences for a diverse range of people involved in the cult phenomenon. Currently, in addition to offerings through People Leave Cults, she volunteers as a co-organizer of the Spiritual Abuse Forum for Education (SAFE) Meetup in Portland, Oregon. She hopes to grow her network and create opportunities for up-and-coming cult specialists.
As a member of the queer community, Ashlen is thrilled to be part of the new wave of helping professionals in the cult recovery field.
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Dhyana Levey (she/her), MSc
Media Consultant
Dhyana Levey is a freelance media consultant and former news reporter at Cult Media Messaging. She produced and hosted the podcast Generation Cult, an interview show about people who grew up in high-demand groups and how they acclimated to mainstream society after they left. In 2022, Dhyana received her MSc in the Psychology of Coercive Control from the University of Salford and has focused her research on the media’s relationship with people who have been in cults. She has a bachelor's degree in journalism and worked as a newspaper reporter in California for Bay Area News Group, McClatchy Newspapers and the San Francisco Daily Journal, as well in Southeast Asia for The Cambodia Daily. She’s been a freelance writer, editor and copywriter for the past decade at a range of publications and websites in the San Francisco Bay Area. She grew up on a commune connected to the United Lodge of Theosophists, an offshoot of the Theosophical Society that was founded in 1875 by controversial esoteric medium H.P. Blavatsky.
What we’ll hope you learn more about:
Registration Information
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Register: $45 per Ticket
Register for the NOT ALONE Conference! Workshops run from 9:00 am - 5:00 pm on May 11, 2024 at the McMenamins Kennedy School in Portland, Oregon.
Lunch is included in ticket purchase and will be provided by the McMenamins Kennedy School Catering Team. With attendees dietary needs and/or restrictions in mind, the lunch will be served buffet style.
After the event, there will be opportunities for an informal happy hour at the venue.
We are excited to offer support, education, and community with this conference!
Donate: Sponsor a Survivor
Want to help a survivor attend?
Please consider donating to help bring vital resources, community, and education for survivors who require financial assistance to attend.
We so appreciate your support!
FAQs
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This conference will be hosted at the McMenamins Kennedy School.
Since its 1915 opening, this historic elementary school has been a beloved fixture of its Northeast Portland neighborhood. McMenamins renovated the once-abandoned scholastic gem and turned it into Portland's most unique hotel. Here you'll find 57 comfy guestrooms with private baths and telephones (some fashioned from former classrooms complete with original chalkboards and cloakrooms – others with an author's theme), a restaurant, multiple small bars, a movie theater, soaking pool, gift shop and a brewery (just wait until the principal hears about this!). Extensive original artwork and historical photographs cover the walls, ceilings, doorways and hallways.
For neighborhood residents, out-of-town guests and business travelers, Kennedy School is a memorable and comfortable place to gather. The hotel is located minutes from Portland International Airport as well as to shopping in downtown Portland.
*We are anticipating that a large majority of attendees will be those local to Portland, Oregon. At this time, there is not a group rate or discounted rate for lodging at the venue. If you are traveling from out of state, and are looking for places to stay as an alternative to the McMenamins Kennedy School, feel free to email us for recommendations: safemeetup.pnw@gmail.com
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Is Financial Assistance Available to Attend?
We realize that some survivors who are fresh out of a cultic group or relationship may be in need of resources. It is the organizer’s hope that we receive enough donations from sponsors and individuals who are able to financially contribute that we can offer financial assistance to cover the registration fee for this event. The more funds we receive, the more financial assistance we can offer to those in need.
Please reach out to the organizers if you are need of financial assistance to attend this event: safemeetup.pnw@gmail.com
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Are CEUs Available for Helping Professionals?
Unfortunately, we will not be able to offer CEUs for licensed professionals. The Conference Sponsor SAFE is a volunteer run meetup and does not have the resources at this time to offer CEUs. We hope that you are still interested in attending regardless and connect with survivors and other helping professionals as we strengthen our network in the PNW!
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This conference will NOT have a virtual component. We realize that virtual streaming aides accessibility, and we apologize that this is not something that we can offer at this time. There were many considerations involved in this decision, such as venue scale, the in-person participants comfort level, budget, and the size of our volunteer team for this event.
Still have Questions?
Send us a message to safemeetup.pnw@gmail.com